Poo Party

Our bus continued south through Greymouth and Westport. Flea explained to us that due to these towns remote and isolated location the sparsely populated towns where full of inbreds. To begin with I thought she was joking but as we probed further into town Flea played spot the inbred and with relish pointed out people starring out from their porches. It had all gone a bit Deliverance and I half expected to hear the twang of a banjo showdown. 

On the fringes of town we stayed in shacks owned by New Zealand’s oldest publican. Les is a short grumpy old man with a bushy grey beard, means well but is very set in his ways. Once settled we played touch rugby on the beach until light disappeared and then we started got ready for the evening.

It was our bus’s fancy dress night and you had to go as anything that started with the first letter of your name. We had one hour to unearth our attire from the salvation army’s clothes bins and I was pretty slow off the mark. I considered; Jesus, Jay-Z and Julius Caesar but going for broke deciding on Jasmine from Aladdin (we had watched it a couple of nights ago). To be honest my transformation wasn’t the most convincing and I defiantly didn't pull it off as well as some of the ladyboys in Thailand. I our room we had a bee, a school girl and Josh and Andy became little red riding hood and the wolf which had nothing to do with their names but looked good anyway. We got to the bar early and quenched our thirst with local ales and soon we were in the company of the spice girls, Jessi J, Harry Potter, Corpse Bride, Amy Winehouse, Moses, Russell Brand and a carrot to name a few. It was a night not easily forgotten, especially since Jasmine’s blood red nail varnish stubbornly remains on my toes as the last remnant of the evening.